Dive into this thought-provoking episode as I unravel misconceptions, advocate for financial autonomy, and offer valuable perspectives on nurturing a thriving partnership.
As you know, hopefully by now, I have been involved with network marketing and social selling for over a decade. And a trend that always came up, especially when I first started that I personally thought would kind of drift off to see, What hasn’t, unfortunately, is this fantasy of retiring your spouse because of the work you put in and the financial success of network marketing and social selling.
And the reason why I say it’s a fantasy is because I’ve been very transparent about network marketing in general. While I believe it is an amazing opportunity for someone to create another stream of income, I do believe you should always have multiple streams of income.
The Truth About Retiring Your Spouse: Real Talk for Network Marketers
The reality is those who hit the benchmarks that I personally have of being in the top 0.01% of their network marketing company, meaning that you’re one of those people who has multiple years multiple, multiple years of multiple 6 figures you’ve accrued over 7 figures.
Right? Like, that percentage is minute compared to how many people take on the opportunity in the 1st place. Literally, it’s 0.01%. And it seems that the 0.01%, for the most part, are the ones screaming about this whole retiring your spouse mentality.
And it’s just not realistic and it’s a major red flag for me. I don’t believe that you should ever put all of your eggs in one basket regardless of whether you’re involved with network marketing, social selling, whatever.
I believe that everyone should have multiple streams of income, which is why I believe social selling and network marketing is so key. I mean, why wouldn’t you wanna earn income from something that you love and you talk about and share a lot. Like, that’s kind of a no brainer. Right?
You’re not just adding to the noise by sharing random memes on social media.
The Impact of One Spouse Retiring on the Other
Or being a consumer, you can actually be someone who is making an income passively on social media. But I also think it’s important that we talk about what this means for your household and your marriage.
Because as someone who has been doing this a really long time. And I would like to think that my husband has always been, well, maybe not in the beginning, full transparency, like so my network marketing company that I have aligned myself with over the last decade is Beachbody, or if you may know it now as BODi. It’s a health and fitness brand.
In the beginning, my husband was not onboard, so to speak. You know, the whole idea of working out at home and, you know, he was never into supplements or anything like that. It just took him a long time to get on board.
And truthfully, it was almost like I had to prove myself, prove that the products worked in order for him to get onboard.
He never did the workouts with me the 1st year. He never drank any of my superfood shakes. It wasn’t his thing but over the last decade, that has obviously changed and he enjoys the workouts and he does the supplements.
You know, he, you know, he picks and he picks and chooses which one he wants to do. He doesn’t do everything, which is fine. He’s been on trips with me. He knows the coaches on my team.
Like he has, you know, made his own sacrifices with time in that whether it’s been team calls or I’ve had to go on retreats. Right? Like so, he’s made sacrifices because he believes in the business and because it served our family.
But, ultimately, to say that he knows the ins and outs of everything that I do on a day to day would be a blatant lie. And when you think about when you are retiring your spouse, you are essentially pulling away a stream of income. Like I said, dumb.
Consequences such as increased taxes, separation of families, and reliance on the government
But, also, that would mean that you are adding your spouse to the payroll in a way. And you really need to ask yourself, like, does your spouse truly have the wherewithal and the understanding of what it is that you do? And then also, do they have the skills? Because I can tell you straight up, I have the gift of gab, clearly. I have my own podcast.
I am very vocal on social media, if you know you know. And for me, I can just riff. I’m riffing right now. I don’t have a script. My husband is much more introverted than I am. And I can tell you that there’s no way, no freaking way that he would ever be able to create the content that I do on social media.
Not only would he struggle to make the content on social media, whether it’s physically creating a reel or, the ad copy or being you know, speaking on a podcast, whatever it may be. He just wouldn’t feel comfortable doing it. Now don’t get me wrong, when he’s in his workplace… he’s also a golf professional, like I am.
He knows how to perform, if you will, because that’s or an arena that he feels comfortable in.
Social media is not an arena that he is even a part of. He doesn’t even have social media. Right? So he doesn’t understand what things are trending and when you are paying someone to be on your payroll, that means you are paying them to do something that they are either more skilled at than you. Right?
They’re an expert in said field. Right? So, you know, whatever it may be. Maybe you don’t know how to create a website. Right? So you outsource it.
Maybe you don’t know how to edit podcasts. So you pay someone to do it, or they’re out there and it doesn’t mean that you don’t know how to do things like, listen, I can make graphics all day on Canva. I know how to write. I know how to speak. I can create ad copy, did it by myself for years, right?
But when I know that there’s someone out there that is just as skilled as I am, maybe a little better, but can do it faster because time is money, then that’s someone who deserves to be on my payroll.
That is someone who deserves to be part of my write offs, if you will, that I’m sending a 1099 to. But to act as if our spouse is one of those people, for most, just like that 0.01% of finding success in network marketing, it’s probably going to be that 0.01% as well that has a spouse, that has a specific skill, that can be utilized for said business. Now does my husband help out with certain things? Sure.
Involvement of Your Spouse In Your Network Marketing Business
I told you he sacrifices his time. He will make sure if I do have to record something. Or if I have a meeting with our daughter, he’s obviously taking care of her. When we’re out and about, if he, you know, is with us and you know, and we have a day off together.
It’s rare in the golf business, but we do have them once in a while. He’ll take B roll footage for me. He’ll take photos. Like, he does have an eye for that.
He’s very skilled in that. He’s creative, but that’s really where it ends. And so I really need people to kinda think about that, especially if you are putting someone on your payroll, like, you need to be able to justify it.
And I don’t wish the IRS to come after anyone, and audit you, and be on their radar for five years. So it’s really something to think about. Now, on top of that, I will be here to say that when you do work from home and you are doing social selling, network marketing, whatever, especially as you’ve grown it and it kinda starts to go on autopilot.
There’s a lot more downtime in your day. And you need to ask yourself, you know, as much as you love your spouse, I do believe it’s important to have time away from one another.
I do believe it’s important for you both to have your own passions and likes and desires, and it makes you a worldly couple that you can talk about these different things together when you get home from work. Right?
But if you’re with one another 24/7, what does your day to day look like? What does the conversation look like? Will boredom set in? My guess is yes.
And on top of that, what I will tell you is that finances are one of the top reasons couples divorce. And if you become that main source of income, which in full transparency, I have been for the 17 years that my husband and I have been together.
The strain financial pressure can add to a marriage and the potential for boredom setting in if spouses are together 24/7
I can tell you that it adds a lot of pressure to your marriage and your relationship.
But I want you to think about what could set in if your spouse wasn’t out working. You know, it’s one thing if you’re working and you’re the breadwinner and all those things and your spouse is leaving every day, going to a job, trying to advance their career. Like, you understand that they are trying to show their worth.
They are trying to move up in said company. But imagine now, they’re at home with you every day and not truly bringing in the income and putting in the same level of effort that you are for the business because they’re not going to because you’re the face of the business, not your spouse.
You need to add this pressure on top of everything else that you do, especially if you are a mother. Because let’s be real, call a spade, a spade and a shovel, a shovel, moms do carry a heavier burden of the two, 9 times out of 10.
So now add the financial stress and pressure on top of everything else you have on your plate. I can tell you that I truly believe this will add immense resentment in your marriage. And for what? So you can be on social media and, you know, blast about how you retired your spouse.
Not only that, and this is a really big one for me. Why are we emasculating men? Now I have my reasons and my thoughts as to why they have really made this hard, hard push for the last 20, 30, 40 years of getting women in the workplace.
It’s twice the number of taxes. It’s removing the core nucleus of the family. If you know, it’s separating, it’s incentivizing sending your child to school, day care. It is obviously, allowing for other people to have stronger influences on your children.
It’s a reliance on the government, so I could go off on a tangent on that. But let’s just circle back to what your spouse is really good at and what they love to do.
The Importance of Complementary Marital Roles and Pursuing Your Passion Together
And when you remove that from them, that ability because they’re home with you. What is that gonna do to your household? Men understand that they have roles. They understand that, no, they’re not gonna be the one to birth the children. No. They’re not gonna be one to feed the children in the first year of life most of the time. Right?
They understand that the female is the nurturer of the family and every marriage has the yin and yang of, you know, what they do. My husband and I are probably the opposite of certain, you know, marriages, whereas I mean, can I cook? Sure.
Can I clean? Yeah. I vacuumed the whole house before I recorded this. But a lot of those things, my husband takes on. He’s very handy. He’s super skilled, like he painted our whole house, like he finds it very therapeutic to wash the cars, like he ‘s just who he is as a person.
You know, if he’s as if I see him coming, you know, I’m coming into the driveway and I see that he’s out there washing his car, especially after a golf tournament. I’m like, okay. He might have had a rough round because I know it’s very therapeutic for him to do that.
Whereas when it comes to filing our taxes, that’s me. Dealing with health insurance and homeowners insurance, that’s me. Those are the things that I’m skilled at, those are my skill sets.
But I can’t even imagine if I told Nick, who loves golf, it gives him confidence in who he is as a person. It showcases so many of his talents. I can imagine taking that away from him.
And I can tell you that he loves it so much, and this is where I would circle back to the resentment piece where there’s no way he could sit at home every day with me and my daughter. He loves us more than anything in the world, but he also loves to compete.
And in order to compete, you have to practice. And you have to be gone. And if you put in time and reps. Right? And then he would be gone from the house practicing while I’m what? Working and taking care of everything else as a wife and a mom.
Allow Your Spouse To Pursue Their Passions and Their God Given Talents
So do you see what I’m saying? Like, we can’t take away something, a passion, a great opportunity drive, you know, the skills that our spouse was born with and has developed for the sake of just having them home.
They should be able to follow their passions. They were given these God given talents and skills for a reason. And most importantly, They should feel like they’re contributing to the family financially.
Because whether you like it or not, that is very important for men. It’s the truth. It is very humbling for them to feel like they’re not providing. It is very humbling and can put a strain on them when their wife is the reason they live the way that they do.
It takes a very, very strong man to be able to handle that. And I’m not saying it’s not possible because my husband is a perfect example of this strong man, but I will tell you that if you took away all of his other passions and skills that do give him that level of confidence in that arena. He would be very deflated. Very deflated.
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You know, for us and I’m gonna stress this again about the multiple streams of income because I think it’s very important for everyone to understand. Multiple streams of income are key. I’ve grown a social network and developed my network marketing business, social selling, affiliate marketing for over a decade.
Simultaneously, with the exception of two years that I was at home with my little girl for reasons that were out of my control, because I was ready and willing to be able to work. I just chose to make different medical decisions than job opportunities were allowing for in that time period.
I have always worked multiple jobs. I’ve been involved with the golf business the whole time. My husband, multiple streams of income for him is having the steady income of working at a country club, teaching at said country club.
Right? But then also competing. Now there’s risk and reward with that, right? Because you’re paying entry fees and you obviously have to give up time to practice and things like that, but it’s another stream of income.
And there are many people in our field that do that and use their skills, you know, at a high level of skills that when it comes to golf to make up for the lack of income of being a traditional golf professional.
It’s very important in our line of work to, obviously, do your standard job of running tournaments, customer service, but teaching is a form of another stream of income, and then competing is also another form of income.
Creating Additional Income Through Passive Investments
So if you right now are all in, all your chips are in on network marketing and social selling, great. But if it’s all in on network marketing, I need you to branch off and start looking at other affiliate opportunities.
If you’re in corporate America right now, you and your spouse, then I need you to start thinking about how you can earn passive income online through network marketing and social selling.
If neither of those things are in, say, your spouse’s interest because he falls into that category of, like my husband where he doesn’t even have a social media account.
Then what can your spouse do in their job to create another source of income. And it doesn’t necessarily mean that they have to take on another job.
But maybe it’s saving a piece of their income and putting it into their 401K and letting that grow passively or setting up a Roth IRA and letting that grow passively.
Do I personally recommend you get involved with the stock market if you have no knowledge of how it works? No. Because it’s legalized gambling, and you’d dang well better know a lot about it. It’s the same thing with real estate.
Unless you have a really strong skill set in knowing trends, the area that you’re purchasing, how to deal with having tenants, you know, unless you have that locked and loaded, I don’t believe that that’s a strong investment.
But I do believe it’s very, using air quotes, easy to set aside money and put it in a mutual fund and let it grow for you.
Because even in years like we’ve had this past year, I can open up my portfolio and albeit, it hasn’t grown as much as previous years, specifically 2016 through 2020, but I digress. It is still growing without me even really doing anything.
It’s just me setting aside money that is tax free to grow for me. So that is something that your spouse can do on top of what you’re doing by having multiple streams of income.
But the whole idea of the two of you sitting at home, you know, collecting checks, like some of these influencers and social sellers want you to believe while you’re watching your favorite Netflix movie or, you know, chilling at the beach with your family, it’s not reality. It’s just not.
This takes a lot of work, and I don’t want you to get lost in that manipulation by social sellers. Because what happens is people buy into that dream and buy into that person selling it. And then when it doesn’t work out, because they don’t end up being one of those 0.01% that I was talking about that actually can make that happen.
They start to resent the industry overall and say it doesn’t work, and that’s not true.
I am all about diversifying income. From passive investments to mutual fund growth, and I’m adamant about the need for not putting all your eggs in one basket. 💰🥚
Network marketing offers real income opportunities.
I’m living proof, as are an enormous amount of women and men that have been a part of my downline, that it works. That you can earn income from this.
You can get your favorite products paid for, and you can be that next level up where you’re earning the same level of salary as your corporate job and you can be in that next level up where you’re making double and then you can be part of that you know, that little tiny 0.01% that I’ve also mentored that has matched me and even surpassed in certain areas of also being in that 0.01%.
There’s different levels to it, but don’t get so caught up in the fantasy that you lose sight of what this opportunity can do for you. Because if you focus on the fantasy and when you don’t reach it, you get pissed off, there’s a very strong chance you just throw the towel in to the whole experience.
And then you’re leaving money on the table, then you’re leaving opportunity on the table, opportunity for friendships, community, new opportunities of companies reaching out to you to represent them, growing your network through social media, your website, a podcast, your email list, and you never know who needs to hear your story.
So focus on your small wins. Continue to have multiple streams of income. Allow your spouse to follow their passion. Do not emasculate them. Let them be the alpha male that they should be.
We need more alpha males in the world, and let them lean into their skills that they are good at, so that you can lean into the skills that you are good at.
And then whatever you lack, that’s when you outsource to someone who is better at it or more efficient with their time than you are.
I hope this helped. I would love to hear your thoughts on what you have seen over the years or, you know, if you’ve, if you’ve thought that this was reality or you’ve kind of rolled your eyes at it, like I have, I would love to know what your experience has been.
If you wanna get more of this type of content, make sure you follow me on Instagram at @macrowley. And if you love this episode, let me know by tagging me on IG or even leaving a podcast review. See you next week.
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